Great article, thanks for sharing. I’ve battled with confrontation avoidance to more or a less a degree all my life. It only really manifests itself in the environment or with people who resemble (rightly or wrongly) the original cause. For me that was a form of bullying outside the family. From the age of 6 til about 15. I did a decent job of unlearning and being authentic myself up until I met my now wife five years ago. Her past involves abuse as well, which can project in ways that resemble my experiences of being bullied: manipulation, gaslighting, devaluation, being set up for good only to be brought down, being put down/humiliated/disrespected etc - narcissistic tendencies. Her own learned behaviours. This experience brought everything back and undid all my progress on confrontation avoidance. I was used to confronting things head on, now I was back to biting my tongue and bottling up to keep the peace. I continue to work on this - it’s never been an issue in relationships before. Confronting the unacceptable behaviour is not actually the issue come to think of it, even the raging reactions, I do actually confront, it’s the denial and invalidation that actually makes me avoid - it’s like ‘why bother?!’ Mental illness, trauma, coping mechanisms, abuse, self-sabotaging behaviour…it’s all a melting pot of madness - but it’s never black and white, we should avoid labels, diagnosis and blame and simply be our authentic self for better or worse…losing that self is one of the most devastating experiences I’ve endured so please everyone - JUST BE YOURSELF. SPEAK AND SHOW YOUR TRUTH.🤙