Love has nothing to do with control, that’s the beauty of it, it’s completely free. It’s a soft and it’s fierce, but never controlling. Love is also all about ourselves, it’s an emotion within us, how we feel about it, give it and receive it has very little to do with other people. Our relationship with love is our own responsibility to nurture, protect and give wisely. Both for ourselves and others.

The original quote you mention highlights this, removing the word ‘love’ shows it as a more desperately needy and controlling one ‘something you want very, very badly’ - that’s not love.

Love exists between two people or it doesn’t. True love actually takes years to manifest itself because it takes years to get to know someone…including ourselves.

How can we possibly love someone, until we *know* them?

And you’re absolutely right, to know someone else, we must first know ourselves. Including what love means to us - how we love ourselves tells us that.