Relate much. Thanks for sharing. All these stories of abuse have so much in common. I feel ashamed of being so easily manipulated. I appreciate it mostly goes the other way, as a man I feel quite alone in my experience. But I guess that’s just the stigma. Anyone can be abusive and anyone can be a victim of it. If our hearts our open and we have genuine self-worth seems to be the common attraction for abusers. I even find empathy for mine, she’s projecting her own, from her dad who she worships and other men in her past as a result. It’s difficult because denial can exist, and the abused can go on to abuse others themselves if that denial prevents active healing. At what point do we give up? I’ve managed to save myself and remain in my marriage. Self-worth and trust in my own mind has returned but like you post break up, can still slip at times. I know the common advice (which I agree with) is to leave, however change can and is happening in my relationship. The narcissistic alter ego created to protect her post abuse is fading away…that’s me being real, not blinded by manipulation. I’m aware it’s still there, and may always be, but she is working on healing now, less in denial sooooo I’m sticking with it.